Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Hopefully this will motivate me some...


Before Robert: I was 179, wearing a size 10-12. I was comfortable with my body and HAPPY!

After Robert: 205, size 16, cant be seen without my clothes on even by my husband, refuse to go out in public unless I have to. So UNHAPPY! And look who I'm standing next to, a freaking handsome cop!


Monday, April 6, 2009

So, I feel things are starting to fall into place a little

I don't know what it is, but I feel so happy right now. Even though I have a lot on my mind, just spiritually I am happy. Robert is doing so much better than he was last week, he is so happy and playful. He loves waving and saying "buh bye." And he is always wanting his "Mama." He is so sweet too, specially when he first wakes up. He loves to just be held and lay on my shoulder. He is trying to walk too. He walks along the couch and tables. It's so cute because he still is a little wobbly. But it's so nice to see him feeling well, I haven't seen this part of him in such a long time. He has the personality of his daddy. I am debating whether or not I want to stay home with him. I would love to be a stay at home mom, but at the same time I love working. I love what I do and I love the people that I work with. I have though quit school for now. I need to be with my family and take care of things at home first. I plan on going back after August. Just with all the stuff going on with the baby, I need to be here for him. Anyways, just needed to get this out.

Friday, April 3, 2009

What the HELL is going on with my child?

I'm beyond stressed out these days. Between having to quit school, in fear of losing my job, and watching my little boy get sick every week, I don't know how I make it through the day. So this past week has been a HORRIBLE week. Robert has been to the doctor 2 times already and the ER once. Last Friday I picked him up from school and he was very sleepy, he had been asleep all day and when he was awake he just wanted to lay on the teachers. That is far from normal for him. I have the type of child who refuses to sleep at school. So I had noticed for a few days that he had been pulling on his ears. So I took his temp and he had a low grade fever. No need to rush to the doctor, just took him on Saturday. Well he was acting great on Saturday. He was laughing and having a good time. So the doctor took some blood tests and his white blood cell count came back high. Normal is 15,000 and his was 22,000. Now I'm freaking out. Just the week before he was put on meds for a bacterial infection. He was on meds for 10 days. So his WBC shouldn't had been high. The doctor had no idea what was going on. He gave him a shot of an antibiotic and a presciption for a new med. So, he takes the new meds on Sunday, and 4 hours later vomits EVERYWHERE. So I called the nurse and they told me to try again the next morning. Well I do, and again he vomits. So we stayed home Monday and stayed on the phone with the doctor to try and figure things out. And he was taken off the meds and I was told to watch him. Well he does GREAT on Tuesday. Back to his old self. Now Wednesday rolls around. I woke him up and took his temp. He had a low grade fever. No biggie, just gave him Mortin and kept him home for a few hours to make sure that it stays down. So at 11 I sent him to school. He had no fever and was wonderful. I went on to work and when I picked him up at 5:00 he had a 104.2 temp. We took him straight to the ER. They run every test possible and we are there for 6 hours. Well, everything came back clean. They said it's viral and to do a Motrin/Tylenol cocktail every three hours. And they gave him a supository to help break the fever. It seems to work. YEAH! I start to get a glimmer of hope. Well, he was asleep all day and I figured that just came from the night before. So at 9:00pm I wake him up and give him a bath and I noticed that he was burning up. So I took his temp. 103.2!!!! What the hell??? I refused to go back to the ER. So I just the Tylenol/ Motrin thing through the night and I took his temp at 8:30 this morning. It was 101.3. So it went down, but it wasnt gone. Now I am freaking out. I don't want to take him back to the doctor because I dont want to overreact. But at the same time I want to know what is going on. I need answers. I havent gotten a firm answer and this kind of stuff has been going on since October. UGH!