I ALMOST MADE IT!

This was taken in 2007 2 months before I got pregnant. It was taken in Kentucky. I was 176 and was a size 10-12. I was very happy with the way that I looked. I was wearing a size Medium shirt. I was tan, healthy, and just pure HAPPY!
This was taken on my 23 birthday in 2007. I was confident enough to go to a baseball game in shorts and a tight shirt. I was very happy and my self-esteem was high. I felt like I looked "normal."

OK, so I have been working out pretty well (except for this week because I had tonsillitis). Anyways, I was able to make it back to the gym tonight and for once I tried running a whole mile without stopping. And much to my surprise it would have been a good 12 minute mile, which for me is good considering I am more of a "fast" walker than a runner. Anyways, about half way through the last 1/4 mile, I got into a horrible coughing spell. I ended up having to quit and go back home because I was coughing so hard I ended up peeing on myself. It was horrible. Having had a baby really messed up my peeing muscles. But I was really upset. I have goals set for myself. I was hopping that wouldn't happen tonight. I could feel it coming on and I thought that the water would ease it. But it just got worse. OMG, I hope that I get over this crap soon. I am ready to get back on track. But I have been doing really well with one thing. My diet, I have done so well sticking to it and staying away from sweets. I have shrank my stomach so much that I can only eat a few bites of my meals before I get full. Wes is enjoying it though, he gets all my left overs. He is my human garbage disposal. But he is wanting to gain weight, where as I want to lose it. So it works out. I just eat smaller portions, and he gets double the portions. But he enjoys grilled foods and isn't huge about fried foods. So that helps me too. Now our biggest thing is to stop eating out every night. I am going grocery shopping tomorrow and getting everything we need for the next week. And what is even better is that Wes wont be home Monday and Tuesday night, so I can tuna fish and salad. He hates tuna fish. And then I can make a home made grilled chicken salad the next night. I don't want to lose a certain number of "pounds," but rather I want to just look healthy again. Before I had Robert I weighed 179, but I was a size 10. I was that size through out high school. So if I could just get back there, that would be great. I have always been considered big when it came to pounds, but when it came to the way that I looked, I have been considered to look healthy. And I know that I will never be "tiny." But I just want to look good and look attractive.